Good-bye Gloucester

The Husband and I are officially out of the Gloucester apartment. No more run ins with The Establishment. No more worrying that the apartment will fall off in a strong wind. While we still have on-street parking, it isn't nearly as terrible to find a spot.

The new place is easily twice as big and much nicer than the last one.  But I can't help but feel...off.

The island has been my base of operations for the majority of my life. Cape Ann has been kind to me. The closest sense of home I feel. Its where most of the family I see is, where I went to school, where my doctor is. It is where my thinking place is.

I am sad to see it in my life's rearview.

Where will I go to think now?
Where will I get coffee that isn't a chain?
Where will I go thrift shopping for costumes?
Where will I get canolis?
But more importantly, Where can I get linguica on my pizza?

The Search Continues

Today is a fairly dreary day in New England. I actually quite enjoy days like this. They are good for reflection. And there are some excellent jams on at work (currently: Guster <3). I keep coming back to the concept of what I am meant to do and today seemed like a good day to have a think about it.

Don’t get me wrong, I actually enjoy my job most days. Not always all the people I work with but who likes all of their co-workers all the time? I am good at what I do--I am a wiz with the software and being detail oriented comes naturally. And girl can multitask with the best. Lately, I just feel...empty when I leave. Emotionally drained. Stressed to the point my muscles hurt. I am the type of employee that comes in and does more than my share of the work, never shying away from taking on more. I naturally try to climb any ladder there is. But these days it all seems so… Meaningless. I am a cog in the corporate machine. I work on the fringe of large companies, adding to the empire of The Man. I just never thought I’d be here. I never thought “Hey girl, what about a business career? Or one that works hand in hand with big business?” Sure, there was a hot second in college where I thought PR was the route for me. That lasted a semester. I realized my peers were driven by the almighty dollar and that I wouldn’t survive in an industry like that.

I always saw myself as a teacher or a community leader or even working in women’s rights. My fancier day dreams lead me to a life of the stage or running my own literary magazine or (and WHOA-dream big here) having my own show on Food Network. Or to be the most academically gay person possible (see below for an explanation). Now, I feel far less sure of myself and wish I had the excitement for what could be as I used to. There are days I feel trapped here because of money. Wouldn’t be extremely irresponsible if I left and ended up someplace I made less? If we want a house, a second car, a kid, or heck-even a vacation shouldn’t I do the right thing for us and stay?

How do we, as adults, create a fulfilling life? How do we find a place in the world that balances needs and expression? Is it possible? Scratch that. Is it possible without working 2 or more jobs?

In general, I feel like I do not excel. Like I am something akin to a jack of all trades-knowing about a lot of things but never mastering anything. Maybe I don’t give myself enough credit or maybe I am dead on. Maybe I recognize that I can do a few things but don’t think it is good enough. The hardest part of reflecting on this is trying to figure out what it is that I am good at and trying to take that a step further.

My dad wanted us to start a catering business or restaurant specializing in Hawaiian food. While I’d love to honor that dream I don’t know if I live in a market where that would be profitable. I also worry I am too far removed for it to be authentic enough.

...But I can marry flavors like a boss. I have shown that in cupcakes and candy. A bakery or sweet shop has been on my radar since I graduated high school. I got accepted to Johnson and Wales for baking. It was a huge victory for me. However, having any kind of business is super risky and takes far more money than I have available. I can talk about food for daaaaaaays, which has always made me want to have a food show. But then I remember that I am fat and worry no one would watch it because of that.

In college, I worked on our literary magazine for a semester as an editor. It was exhilarating to pick the pieces and try to fit them together in an abstract story. I’ve thought about trying to start one online but have no idea where to even begin.

And then there is my love gender and queer studies. My goal for awhile was to be the most academically gay person alive. Degree in Gender and Queer Studies and working for a non-profit or queer publishing house. Maybe teaching it. I can read gender and queer symbolism easily and find it fascinating.

...I don’t even know where I am going with this post anymore. I am impressed if you made it this far. Here’s hoping today’s contemplation is a step closer to figuring out what I want to be when I grow up.

3, 2, 1: A Musical PSA

Life has been a blur lately. Rocky Horror is keeping me insanely busy this October. We're getting ready to leave Gloucester and move to Lynn in November. And, work has been... Work. One thing has remained constant: Tune-age. It's time to pull out my musical soap box again and dole out some tips on tunes to get you through the day.

In this installment, I present 3 songs you should listen to, 2 local artists to look out for, and 1 song you should probably try to forget about.

3:

The biggest band on the list (and the best come back news I have heard in a while) is the triumphant return of one of my favorite groups, Counting Crows. From Mr. Jones to pretty much anything they put out, I am there and always pleased. Not to mention, Adam Duritz started my obsession with dread on white guys (and Laaaaaaaaawd, do I still want to have dreads some day as well).



I didn't choose the awkward life, it chose me.
 

Well, the guys are back with a new album called Somewhere Under Wonderland. The first single released didn't get much play here, but the second single "Scarecrow" is blowing up and it is pure magic. This song brings carefully crafted music together with lyrics that are stirring and whimsical and perfect. (I am starting to fan girl here). The video is the first in a series and embodies the very American rock feel of the track. And it doesn't star the band (I missed the dreads, #nolies), which is very abnormal but extremely refreshing.

 

Dig it and want to listen to more? Try on: Round Here, Mr. Jones, A Long December, The Ghost in You, or Hanginaround. Want to feel moved after listening to a song? Queue up Colorblind. Simple lyrics but the delivery is overwhelming.

 

 

 

A lesser known but rad band to look out for is Walk the Moon. Sometimes described as "indie pop-art" this band is a 4 man set up full of multitasking musicians that create a fun sound to groove to. Definitely inde in genre, it is clear that there are some New Wave influences here which is probably why I dig them as much as I do. The first single to drop off their second studio album Talking is Hard is "Shut Up and Dance." The lyrics are sweet and catchy, making the already very dancey music last in your head long after the song is over--But not in that terrible way that makes you want a lobotomy.

 



 

 

Last on the list of things you should be listening to is Sheppard. This Australian indie pop band started out as a brother and sister duo but expanded (and added another sister to the mix as well) a few years ago. They dropped their first studio album Bombs Away in July and their first single "Geronimo" was released in February in Australia where is reached number one. It is now out in the US and I am hoping it makes a big splash here. Heavy on repetition and rhyme, the lyrics are quick to commit to memory making it a great song for the mid-day work slump. The almost haunting quality of the faded out female voice singing the phrase "bombs away" adds a little depth to the pure indie pop formula of the song.

 



 

2.

 

I am a big supporter of local artists, regardless of the media they work with. Massachusetts, and the North East in general, have put out many fantastic artists including some phenominal musicians. I am going to focus on two today, One gaining a lot of radio play with multiple songs that have been used on TV and one I happened to stumble upon at the Topsfield Fair.

 

Will Dailey is a Boston based artist that has 6 or 7 albums under his belt and has steadily had his music featured on TV shows since 2006. Will has a rich voice that pairs well with his retro sound. The finished product lays at the nexus of vintage rock, roots, and pop. His current radio hit, "Sunken Ship," is off of his latest album National Throat and the song is a finalist in the 2013 International Songwriting Competion.

 



 

 

The second band in this category is Gretchen and The Pickpockets. The Husband and I venture to teh Topsfield Fair every year with some of our friends, and while this year's group attendance was low we had a fabulous time with the Beautiful Amazon, the Leatherman, and the Wee Amazon. We stopped for some noms, because what is a trip to the fair without delicious fair food, and the men found us seating right by the stage this band was jamming on. Serendipitous.

 

Gretchen and The Pickpockets hail from New Hampshire but play shows all around New England (and beyond). A simple set up of 2 guitars, a bass, drums, back up vocals by the guys with lead vocals by Gretchen, and a little trumpet-they work together so well to create a sound as unexpected as it is lovely. The set we heard was covers. Gretchen has a smokey, bluesy, soulful quality to her voice that helps transform the songs they are covering to a point that it feels like you are rediscovering them. I haven't heard the cover I have posted below... but I am a sucker for covers of Lorde's "Royals." I hope its as good as their set was. JK... I can't find it to upload. So an Imagine Dragons cover will have to do.

 

 

1.

And that brings us to the less awesome segment: a song you should try to forget about. I say try because it is SO GODDAMNED CATCHY and it is EVERYWHERE.

 

Also hailing from Massachusetts is Meghan Trainor. Her song "All About That Bass" blew up the charts in a blink of an eye. Its dancey, and catchy... and the message isn't completely terrible. Her skinny bitches dig, is followed by "no, I'm just playing" which can seem like a half-hearted way of trying not to alienate the skinnier listeners. No one needs to put down another to lift someone else up, even in jest. I am pretty ok with most of the song. Yay, self-love! Yay, acceptance! Yay, body positivity! Yay, calling out magazines' impossible beauty standards! BUT REMEMBER, BOYS LIKE MORE BOOTY TO HOLD ON TO AT NIGHT. AND THEY LIKE IT WHEN YOU HAVE BOOM BOOM/ALL THE RIGHT JUNK IN THE RIGHT PLACES.

 

*sigh*

 

Really? Your mama told you that it's ok to be larger because boys like more booty to hold on to?

 

LIES.

 

The video is adorably...pink. And Ms. Trainor is adorable. But the truly best part of the video if the gentleman with the sweater around his shoulders gettin' down like he is Jimmy Junior Pesto (#allriiiiiiiiiiiiiight). What could have been a truly empowering song ends up sending mixed messages about body acceptance.

 







Back on the Horse?

Wow. So I never ended up making that Singapore Chow Mei Fun (womp womp). And life has been cray, 50 Shades of Cray. BUUUUT, a lot of awesome stuff has happened with a dash of terrible and a lot of crying.

On an extremely positive note: I am an Auntie again! The wee neice is beautiful and perfect. And has the coolest room ever, thanks to her crafty mom and carpenter dad.

I also took on a new RHPS role: Dr. Frank-N-Furter! This is/was awesome. However, the lead up to it was...not. It was a week of tears. I am pretty sure I cried myself dehydrated. I had packages of costume pieces and make-up stolen after delivery (Bless Amazon for being so great about stolen shipments/refunds.). Costume pieces not fitting. Things being comically too small. And some epic last minute punting by The Husband.

The show was good. For those who are unaware of my RHPS nerdage: The cast I am in is one I directed for a few years a while back. I spent years stage managing shows or just taking notes while directing. I am hyper-critical of my own performance (not as much for others). I got in my head, BAD. I decided EVERYTHING I did was out of sync with the movie, so I set up camp in my head and totally psyched myself out. I can say I didn't totally suck. It needs some work, but it is not the end of the world.

Even more fun, was the show the night before. Getting to see a friend tackle the same role and NAIL IT was so exciting. It isn't often a bunch of new Franks drops in your lap and this October our cast has 3! Bow chick wow wow.

More interesting posts to follow, I swear.

The Ball. It Was Dropped.

So... Clealry I dropped it like it was hot here.

Terribly sorry!

Here's a quick update:

• We're moving! In November. And sadly, I tink I might miss The Establishment.
• I can get a puppy!
• I am taking on 1, possibly 2, new Rocky Horror roles.. the first of which is Dr. Frank-N-Furter. jiggly thighs and bits EVERYWHERE.
• Trying a new dinner tonight: Singapore Mei Fun. Maybe a quick post on that soon.

Budapest- George Ezra

This song is my everything right now. It's my work jam. My putting on make-up jam. Everything but my cooking jam--That is usually the Fallout Boy station on Pandora.

 

 

 

 

Listen. Love. Jam.

You're welcome.

The Crackhead Argument

Lately, The Establishment has been quiet. Less people in and out. No children and infants hanging outside. It was the calm before the storm.

As The Husband and I were leaving to head out to Arlington yesterday, a… gentleman left The Establishment. He looked inebriated. At the very least hopped up on something. His gait was swirvey at best and he didn’t look like he was of sound mind. He was in front of us by a few yards. Then the spectacular shouting match started.

From behind us, another… gentleman started to engage the head lady at The Establishment in what can only be described as the “no, YOU’RE a crackhead” argument.

It goes a little something like this:

Head Lady in Charge: You’re a fucking scumbag!

Gentleman: I’m a scumbag? You’re a fucking crackhead! Fucking meth head!

*back and forth for a minute on each being scumbags, crack heads, meth heads and crazy pieces of shit*

Gentleman: Just remember, my cousin is a cop you bitch!

HLIC: You’re a fucking scumbag! Your crackhead!

The man ahead of us, looking like he was a tweaker who just got some sweet Shaboo, stopped and waited for the other gentleman and they walked off into the hot afternoon together.

Because Gloucester.